How to Talk to Your Kids About…Friendship
Although some children naturally handle friendship better than others, all kids need to be taught, and practice friendship skills. Kids grow into these skills and need help from parents and other adults to learn the rules of friendship.
How can we help our children learn these key skills?
Talk to your child about what makes a good friend. Kids don’t always know what it means to be a good friend. Make a friendship list with all the qualities of a good friend. Have them tell you what they think makes a good friend. Keep the list close and talk to your child about trying to be that kind of friend. Some possibilities to consider for your list:
Good friends have much in common. They are…
- Helpful to others
- Positive and Kind
- Have the ability to share
- Can keep confidences
- Listen to others’ thoughts and ideas
- Accept mistakes
- Are good winners and losers
- Can hold a conversation
- Give and receive compliments
Role Play, Role Play, Role Play
Talk through scenarios like:
- What do you do if you want to play with a group of friends who are already playing together? You observe first and then join in without interrupting or being pushy.
- What if you ask a friend to play and they say “no”.
- How would you feel if someone was mean to you?
This prepares your child for situations they are certain to face and teaches them empathy for others.
Talk about “Best Friends”
When we push our children to tell us about their “best friend”, we are subconsciously teaching them to exclude. We are teaching them there is a criteria for friendship. Talk about the need to be friends and accept everyone.
Model Friendship
Our children watch everything we do. Are we modeling good friendships skills?
We can model friendship skills when we play with our children. It is an opportunity to talk to them, and show them how to act. When they beat us at Candy Land, show them how to be a good loser. When we win, model how to be a good winner.
Talk about what to do when they are rejected by a friend.
- It is okay to move on. Encourage your child to put effort into friendships with children who reciprocate, and move on.
- Don’t say “I told you say.” Avoid talking about all the things your child did wrong. When a friendship goes south, we need to show extra love to our children. The rejection has already made them feel vulnerable; they don’t need us to add salt to the wounds.
Have a conversation about friendship with your child today.
Child Health & Safety News Roundup: 09-17-2012 to 09-23-2012
Welcome to Pediatric Safety’s weekly “Child Health & Safety News Roundup”- a recap of the past week’s child health and safety news headlines from around the world.
Each day we use Twitter to communicate relevant and timely health and safety information to the parents, medical professionals and other caregivers who follow us. Occasionally we may miss something, but we think overall we’re doing a pretty good job of keeping you informed. But for our friends and colleagues who are not on Twitter (or who are but may have missed something), we offer you a recap of the past week’s top 20 news-worthy events.
- In Kansas, a battle over what pediatric oral health benefits ought to go into the “essential health benefits” pkg. http://t.co/Mu9kCBFz 2012-09-22
- Salt: A Child’s Indulgence That Should Be Checked | Care2 Healthy Living http://t.co/XXFde9j9 2012-09-22
- September 2012: 346,000 Babies in the United States Will Turn One and Can Now Enjoy Honey http://t.co/X8kZ4hcL 2012-09-21
- Childhood obesity linked to food packaging chemical BPA http://t.co/zIkGm6YL wonder if the link is actually in reverse? 2012-09-21
- Pediatricians may skip kids’ blood pressure checks | Fox News http://t.co/4lbwLxWJ 2012-09-21
PedSafe Headline of the Week:
FDA expands alert on feeding infants SimplyThick – PLS check article for list of symptoms of necrotizing enterocolitis (NEC), if using this product http://t.co/LBofJ41c
- Helping children overcome burn trauma http://t.co/qRE1PAVr 2012-09-21
- Technique that gives children 3 parents may be a year away in UK http://t.co/OMiLCJ9X if it eradicates a horrific disease…thoughts? 2012-09-21
- If your child is cranky or stressed, cut out texting | http://t.co/gF2L8vfG 2012-09-21
- Parental involvement necessary to overcome children’s obesity | http://t.co/n0YACaQt 2012-09-20
- Three Ways to Keep Tabs on Your Child’s Online Activity: Yoursphere for Parents http://t.co/5lIE4GXk 2012-09-20
- Colored Water Balz dangerous to kids if swallowed – they are small initially but grow to racquetball size in water http://t.co/dr96aCCW 2012-09-20
- Are you buying safe baby products? | BabyCenter Blog http://t.co/LHbwhdZ2 2012-09-20
- Human trafficking: Another reason to watch your kid’s online activity – Please read this! http://t.co/QFJjEBTP 2012-09-20
- Do You Praise Your Kid Too Much?? There’s a Better Way… http://t.co/kdgpW3lD 2012-09-19
- Sept 16th-22nd is National Child Passenger Safety Week – pls make sure your children are secure! http://t.co/AKiGpsCm 2012-09-18
- High Sodium a Concern for Children, Study Finds – Children and teens on average consume as much sodium as adults http://t.co/s1mymnw8 2012-09-18
- My Child Has Been Bullying Someone Online – What Now? http://t.co/dOBBO6jx 2012-09-17 Great article by online family safety expert Mary Kay Hoal
- Honoring National Child Passenger Safety Week: Great question about car seat safety answered http://t.co/Fj3zf6fV 2012-09-17
Great News Needle-phobic Parents: New Flu Shot Uses Tiny Needle
If you are among the many moms and dads who are scared of needles, this year’s flu shot might be a lot less scary. Ninety percent less scary, that is!
The new intradermal flu vaccine uses a 90% smaller needle to inject the vaccine into the skin, instead of muscle. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the intradermal vaccine not only requires a smaller needle but it has 40% less antigen that the regular flu shot while still being as effective as the traditional vaccine. Antigen is the part of the vaccine that helps your body build protection against flu viruses and since each intradermal vaccine requires less than the traditional shot, more doses can be made from the same amount of antigen.
The intradermal vaccine is designed to protect against the three strains of flu deemed most likely to be the most prevalent this flu season as determined by flu research. It is recommended for adults ages 18 through 64. Unfortunately, it has not yet been approved for children younger than 18, but the traditional flu vaccine shot and nasal spray flu vaccines are still available for those who fall outside the age range for the intradermal shot. Consult the CDC Seasonal Influenza guidelines to help you decide which form of the vaccine is appropriate for you and your family members, and if you have any concerns, consult your healthcare provider.
Flu season typically peaks in the winter months, but the CDC recommends getting vaccinated as soon as the influenza vaccine is available, since it can take two weeks for your body to develop the necessary antibodies to protect you. With flu shots widely available at doctor’s offices, pharmacies and flu shot clinics, it is more convenient and easier than ever to get vaccinated and protect yourself and your family from the flu this season.
For more information about the intradermal and traditional flu vaccines, please visit the CDC for up to date seasonal flu information.
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Editor’s Note: For those of you with little ones whose needle-phobia rivals your own, consider reading the story of Buzzy by Dr Amy Baxter. Not only did she create an innovative way to help reduce the pain of getting a shot but she also has some terrific hints to help overcome your child’s stress before and during their visit to the doctor).
Now it’s a little easier for all of you to be brave – so go ahead and get your flu shots…and have a safe and healthy winter. 🙂
Sat. Sept 22, AMC Sensory Friendly Films will show Finding Nemo
Once a month, AMC Entertainment (AMC) and the Autism Society have teamed up to bring families affected by autism and with other special needs ”Sensory Friendly Movie Screenings“ – a wonderful opportunity to enjoy their favorite “family-friendly” films in a safe and accepting environment.
The movie auditoriums will have their lights turned up and the sound turned down. Families will be able to bring in snacks to match their child’s dietary needs (i.e. gluten-free, casein-free, etc.), there are no advertisements or previews before the movie and it’s totally acceptable to get up and dance, walk, shout, talk to each other…and even sing – in other words, AMC’s “Silence is Golden®” policy will not be enforced during movie screenings unless the safety of the audience is questioned.
Does it make a difference? Absolutely! “It can be challenging enough to bring ANY child to a movie theater” says PedSafe Special Needs Parenting Expert Rosie Reeves. “For a parent with a special needs child attempting an outing like this may seem overwhelming. And yet getting out, being with the community and sharing in an experience with an audience can be invaluable for just such children”.
On Saturday September 22nd at 10am local time, Finding Nemo will be screened as part of the Autism Society “Sensory Friendly Movie Screenings” program (although not in 3D for our Sensory Friendly audiences). Tickets are $4 to $6 depending on the location. To find a theatre near you, here is a list of AMC theatres nationwide participating in this fabulous program (note: to access list, please scroll to the bottom of the page).
Coming October 13th: Frankenweenie
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Editor’s note: Although Finding Nemo has been chosen by the Autism Society as this month’s Sensory Friendly screening, and is rated G by the Motion Picture Association of America, we do want parents to know that it does include some mild violence and potentially frightening scenes. As always, please check the IMDB Parent’s Guide for a more detailed description of this film to determine if it is right for you and your child.
Do You Praise Your Kid Too Much?? There’s a Better Way…
All parents want their kids to feel like they can take on the world. So you may naturally gush over her every scribble, tied shoelace and successful trip to the potty. But is that the best strategy to build competence today and success in the future?
“Confidence is not something you can bestow like a gift,” says Vickie Holland, a parenting coach in Santa Monica, Calif., and the author of the forthcoming book Parenting That Works. “You have to give kids a roadmap for finding confidence from within. It’s the difference between giving someone a fish and teaching them to fish: They need the tools to succeed, without your help.”
Here’s Holland’s advice for providing your child with opportunities every day to say, “I’m strong! I can do this!”
- Put him to work. Give age-appropriate jobs to your child, such as watering plants, feeding the fish, pairing his socks or making his bed. Completing a task provides a sense of accomplishment and fosters pride in his abilities.
- Let her solve her own problems. Resist the urge to rescue! Giving her a chance to troubleshoot the spilled box of blocks or the cup she can’t reach empowers her to think for herself, learn new skills and tackle new challenges with confidence.
- Give him choices. Crayons or chalk? Cereal or muffin? The opportunity to make simple everyday decisions gives him a sense of control over his life and instills the belief that his opinions are valued.
- Cultivate his inner approval system. A big “Wow!” from you can turn a simple watercolor into a masterpiece, but it also pins his self-worth on your reaction. Instead, help him find approval from within by asking what he likes about his creation. When you do give feedback, be specific (e.g., “I like how you made the sun’s rays come up from behind the mountains”).
- Emphasize effort over talents. Whether she aces a task or comes up short, praise her effort over natural talent or smarts, because effort is something she can control. When you praise her efforts, it reinforces the idea that her actions make a difference.
- Take her seriously. Spend time with your kid on her terms — playing with LEGOs on the floor or trying on silly hats — and truly hear and consider her ideas (no matter how zany). Giving her your time and attention validates her sense of self. It sends the message, “You’re important.”
Praise may provide a temporary boost in confidence, but allowing your child to develop skills on his own helps him to believe in his capabilities. And that’s a gift that lasts a lifetime.
Child Health & Safety News Roundup: 09-10-2012 to 09-16-2012
Welcome to Pediatric Safety’s weekly “Child Health & Safety News Roundup”- a recap of the past week’s child health and safety news headlines from around the world.
Each day we use Twitter to communicate relevant and timely health and safety information to the parents, medical professionals and other caregivers who follow us. Occasionally we may miss something, but we think overall we’re doing a pretty good job of keeping you informed. But for our friends and colleagues who are not on Twitter (or who are but may have missed something), we offer you a recap of the past week’s top 25 news-worthy events.
- Can my child’s lice shampoo really cause cancer? http://t.co/O01nsv7k 2012-09-16
- Snoring may affect behavior, health in kids http://t.co/eSHbziTv 2012-09-16
- Health Board Votes to Require Parental consent for Ultra-Orthadox Jewish Circumcision Ritual that may carry risk http://t.co/UN6Qwkok 2012-09-16
- Peanut allergies significantly on the rise. Parents should be on lookout for symptoms http://t.co/46hwDQRP 2012-09-15
- Whooping cough vaccine loses effectiveness too fast. Health officials considering add’l booster http://t.co/x0ltY9Vk 2012-09-15
PedSafe Headline of the Week:
First Pediatric Study to Look at the Role of Vitamin D in Critical Illness http://t.co/y1aBmqXw
- Consumer Product Safety Commission Issues Advisory On Drowning Deaths – 137 kids less than 15years old drowned this summer http://t.co/OV7eWQYN 2012-09-15
- Children’s health, access to care differ by parents’ immigrant status http://t.co/kG4AQpqz 2012-09-14
- Overweight teens don’t necessarily consume more calories than their trimmer peers http://t.co/FaGwSzhn 2012-09-14
- Which child health issues should the presidential candidates address? | National Poll on Children’s Health http://t.co/FvrJIHf6 2012-09-14
- Most GA parents recognize the severity of childhood obesity but are in denial when it comes to their own kids http://t.co/XToUuHWe 2012-09-14
- California parents with kids in private schools more likely to opt out of vaccines | http://t.co/3Hdji9OK 2012-09-14
- Pediatric Neurologist Calls Attention to Childs Risk of Concussion from Falling | http://t.co/OrAQBR0x 2012-09-14
- Put Traffic Safety on Back-to-School ‘To-Do’ List: Experts http://t.co/tPOQGi7h 2012-09-12
- Getting Your Teen Tech Ready for College: Yoursphere for Parents http://t.co/3GEPmaZH 2012-09-12
- Is Your Stress Harming Your Kids? http://t.co/B0WZ9r3s 2012-09-12
- Pediatricians’ Group Urges Flu Shot for Kids Aged 6 Months & Up http://t.co/GSLz0z3I 2012-09-11
- Baby Sleep Training Methods Safe For Infants [STUDY] http://t.co/wtJKlcCO 2012-09-11
- New and violent trends in infant abductions http://t.co/D2vjDRDj 2012-09-11
- An ADHD drug rejected for a govt subsidy because of “uncertain safety” in adults was used by more than 19,000 kids http://ow.ly/dCgoq 2012-09-11
- Top 10 Toxic Products You Don’t Need | Healthy Child Healthy World http://t.co/7smksycm 2012-09-10
- High chairs tested for safety, convenience http://t.co/6jOFyi1W 2012-09-10
- Health Tip: Cleaning a Young Child’s Teeth – Oral care is important even for newborns. http://t.co/47eaHJjz 2012-09-10
- Children’s diet less healthy when school starts | UAE Parents pack things that are quick to prepare http://t.co/4Gbx00Nx 2012-09-10
- Signs of progress? Obesity among Philly’s kids is down http://t.co/dOU1XvPN 🙂 good way to start the week! 2012-09-10