4 Thumb-sucking Remedies That Work

Last updated on March 15th, 2026 at 08:14 pm

Got a sucker? As sweet as it may seem when your kids are toddlers, the nasty habit can wreak havoc on tooth and mouth development if it continues after adult teeth appear, or around age 5. Most kids stop on their own before then; others respond to gentle reminders or praise. But if your kids’ digits remain the go-to soother once they’ve started school, try these mom-tested tips for kicking the habit.

Focus on fashion: At age 3, Imani Robinson loved her two middle fingers. But she loved fashion more! Her mom, Kenya Robinson of Los Angeles, used colorful band-aids to help her kick the habit. Imani loved the pink girly ones so much she didn’t dare get them wet.

Find a role model: Whether it’s an older sibling or the cool kid down the street, find an impressive role model who either quit the habit or never started it. That’s what worked for Fred Gabriel’s younger son Jeremy. “He really wanted to emulate his big brother Sam — and Sam never sucked his thumb,” says the Kent, Conn., dad.

Dial the doctor or dentist: Sometimes, parents aren’t the best authority figures. Elena Tapper’s middle son, Dylan, was very selective sucker — going for the thumb only when he had a snuggly in hand, which was never in public. Nothing the Montclair, N.J., mom said made a difference. But when Dylan was nearly 6, the dentist sat him down and made a deal with him: On his birthday, he’d quit cold turkey. It worked.

Get creative: It took a story and a song to get Kristen Jenkins’s 3-year-old daughter Olivia to stop sucking her thumb. The Harrisburg, Penn., mom read The Berenstain Bears and the Bad Habit and made up a song to go with it: “I’m 3; no more thumb for me!” Six week later, the job was done. Andrea Van Ness of Denver grew so frustrated by her son Charlie’s incessant thumb-sucking, she created Thumbuddy To Love, a sucking cessation system that includes finger puppets, a storybook and success stickers. Her son quit in two weeks and launched her into entrepreneurship.

Stopping finger-sucking doesn’t have to be a painful process — and it may save you from future pain and expense at the orthodontist’s.

Is Sitting at a Computer Hurting Your Child?

Last updated on March 15th, 2026 at 08:13 pm

I ache. Frequently. You’ll understand if you’ve ever had it. Back pain. More debilitating than you could have ever imagined….until you’re actually experiencing it. And then there’s the treatment and coping strategies, sometimes painful and difficult, other times seemingly goofy but necessary. I particularly remember the spectacle I was at the office for several months – scaring colleagues when they discovered me lying prostrate on the floor in an empty cubicle, hiding in small meeting rooms to do pelvic exercises and surely defying some corporate dress code with the fluorescent orange crocs I wore when standing at my computer.

But back pain is just the jumping off point for this story….where it led me is on a journey into the world of office “ergonomics.” Significant and increasing numbers of workplace injuries are related to poor workstation ergonomics – or, said another way, computer stations and desks that don’t properly fit the person using them. The field of ergonomics is full of technical terms and fancy equipment but, in the end, it’s really about the kind of common sense advice you used to get from your grandmother: “don’t slouch,” “sit up straight,” “keep your legs in front of your chair and your feet on the floor” – and its relevance unfortunately goes way beyond the world of factories and office workers.

Although a focus on “ergonomics for children” is relatively recent, we know that children are subject to many ergonomic stresses – from heavy backpacks to long periods of study or play in front of computers, often at desks that are not set up for their size. Data is currently limited on the immediate risks to kids for injuries like neck and back pain and carpal tunnel syndrome, but given that it takes several years for these types of injuries to appear, can we afford to take a “wait and see” attitude?

What can Parents, Schools and Child Safety Advocates Do?

Know what good looks like. Can you recognize healthy computer posture? Do you model these habits at home? Despite all the knowledge I gained at work, I realized I wasn’t following the advice at home because I didn’t have the same set-up and equipment. But a little education and some simple, inexpensive “fixes” can help get your family on the right path (see box below for tips on healthy computer use).

Teach your children. Mastering proper computer use will be of life-long value to any child in today’s high-tech knowledge economy. Children should know how to work safely at the computer and be aware of the risks of poor habits. However, many children learn better visually. In addition to discussing good posture, consider placing photos of good and bad computer ergonomics next to your home or school computers. Some sites provide examples you can print (see Cornell photos and comic), but you can also have your children be the models. They will find it fun to have their photos on the wall and might learn more by having to demonstrate both good and bad habits!

Monitor the situation. Kids aren’t as aware as adults of their body position, so you will need to give regular reminders about their posture. Also monitor their time on the computer – ensure they take breaks every 30-60 minutes. You can download free usage monitoring software that reminds kids when they need to take a break and suggests stretches to do – or you can always set a kitchen timer (click here for Cornell’s stretching exercises-scroll to #4).

Focus on schools. School districts worldwide are focused on increasing student access to computers; however, the majority of emphasis is on the quality of the computers, not the workstations. Check to see if your school or district has computer ergonomics guidelines and curricula. This is becoming a higher priority in education, as evidenced by last year’s ergonomics equipment and teaching resolutions passed by the California state-wide PTA organization. And just like at home, improvements don’t have to require lots of expensive equipment.

Healthy Computer Use for Kids

Start with looking at how well the computer station fits your child or students. Is the computer used for the whole family, or a range of different-sized kids? If your child is having to contend with a poorly fitting workstation, problems may be on the horizon. To ensure healthy computer use by children – by anyone – the most valuable thing to remember is the 90-degree rule: that key body elements should be at “right” or “90-degree” angles when sitting at a computer to maintain natural body alignment and not cause stress through over or under extension. A few useful guidelines:

Chair / Lower Body

• Whatever your child sits on should position the keyboard at elbow height. Achieve this through an adjustable chair or by using a pillow to raise him up.
• Make sure the feet are supported so that his knees are bent at roughly 90-degrees. His thighs shouldn’t slope up or down, or pressure is increased on the lower back. While there are specially-designed footrests on the market, you can also use a sturdy box or low child footstool. As I type this, my feet are resting on my Wii Fit board…at least this way it’s getting some use!
• Also ensure support for his lower back via a pillow or rolled towel. This will help minimize slouching and support a 90-degree angle between his torso and thighs.

Keyboard and Mouse / Upper Body

• Arms should be relaxed at the side with the elbows bent at 90-degrees and the keyboard should be positioned so that wrists are straight – not angled up or down.
• A wrist rest may be useful for support. You can purchase one from any office supply store or fashion one with a towel (be sure it is sized to keep the child’s wrists straight).
• The mouse should be placed near the keyboard to prevent strain from reaching.
• If your child struggles with the size of the keyboard or mouse you may want to consider child-sized equipment (see “Little Fingers” keyboard). Also, some kids find trackballs easier to manipulate than a mouse.

Monitor / Head and Neck

• The monitor should be placed so that your child’s head will be facing straight ahead and level – so the chin and neck are roughly at 90-degrees. You definitely don’t want him looking up or too far down.
• Arrange lighting to avoid glare or bright spots on the monitor to prevent eye strain. To do this you may need to use overhead room lights and position desk lights away from the monitor.
• Remind your kids to look away from time to time and blink…studies show that computer use results in decreased blinking. Make the computer a “zombie-free zone!”

Our Super-Successful Kids Are Struggling! How to Help Them Thrive

Last updated on May 4th, 2026 at 06:31 pm

What if I told you that 1 out of every 3 kids age 6 to 11 is afraid that the Earth won’t exist when they grow up???

WHO are these children??? What if I told you that little kid you just kissed goodnight,,, who got an A on his test…who practiced her cello for hours… what if I told you they were the ones who said it. What if instead I told you they believed it and told NO ONE??? How is it possible this is happening??

Parents, meet the “Running on Empty” Generation – smart and dearly loved, inclusive and open-minded, well-educated with high aspirations for college and their future. From the outside everything you want and more for your child. But take a second look. These kids are less happy, more stressed, lonely, depressed, and suicidal than ANY other generation… and that was BEFORE COVID!

“We are college and career ready, but sure aren’t ‘human’ ready.” Erin, 16 years old

We are raising a generation of “strivers” – kids that are wonderful at reaching for the brass ring, but never feel good enough. We haven’t given them basic survival tools so when the real challenges hit, they often quit because they don’t have the inner reserve that helps them get through it…

“My parents do everything for me. My biggest worry when I leave home is that I’m going to flunk life.” 17-year-old straight-A student, headed for Yale

Surprisingly, despite today’s kids living through the most stressed time in known history – terrorism, lockdown drills, daily pandemic death counts, insurrections, food insecurity, failing power grids, climate crises and racial violence – some kids are not only surviving, but they’re also thriving.

They are bouncing back despite adversity. WHY?

In her new book THRIVERS, Dr. Michele Borba, Ed. D. shares with us the answer.

In the end, these kids – the Thrivers –manage adversity, develop healthy relationships, and embrace change. They are ready and deal proactively with whatever the world throws at them – even in uncertain times, not because of genes, GPA, IQ or a special skill or talent, but through reliance on a few character strengths they learned along the way that helped them steer their lives in a positive direction – helped them PICK THEMSELVES UP whenever their worlds came crashing down.

It is these seven essential Character Strengths that set Thrivers apart and set them up for happiness and greater accomplishment later in life. Self-confidence, empathy, self-control, integrity, curiosity, perseverance, and optimism – each of these helps safeguard our kids against the depression and anxiety that threatens to derail them. And best of all, these strengths are not something we are born with: from toddler to teen, these can be taught!

But where should you start?? THRIVERS is organized into three parts allowing parent to focus on strengths by category. It’s helpful to understand your child’s “superpowers” – what they’re already good at and can nurture – as well as areas that could use further development.

Consider how you would rate your child on the following: 5 = always, 4 = frequently, 3 = sometimes, 2 = rarely, 1 = never

My Child:

1. Speaks mostly positively about herself, rarely negatively.
2. Displays concern and wants to help when someone is treated unfairly or unkindly.
3. Can be trusted to do the right thing and keep his word even when no one is looking.
4. Able to manage her own impulses and urges without adult help.
5. Intrigued or easy to motivate about trying something new, different, or surprising.
6. Does not become upset when something is difficult; rarely quits but keeps trying.
7. Can find the silver lining in a hardship or challenge.

As I’m sure you guessed each of these questions represents one of the 7 Character Strengths and is part of a longer assessment that will help you evaluate where your child is right now so you can determine which traits are their natural strengths and which traits need to be encouraged.

Know that these traits are cumulative: each character strength improves a child’s thriving potential as well as academic performance but is always more powerful when combined with another because they create a Multiplier Effect.

Self-Confidence + Curiosity increases self-knowledge and builds self-assuredness and creativity.

Self-Control + Perseverance boosts the chance of reaching a goal and achieving success.

Empathy + Curiosity helps find common ground and strengthens relationships.

At this point some of you may be thinking…yes this all sounds good, but bottom line, I’ve got to give my child every advantage so they can get into the right school because everything depends on that.

But does it? According to Dr. Borba these amazing, brilliant, talented kids are checking out – the urgency in writing this book came from an email from a distraught mom looking for help from her community:

“We have forty dead kids in two-and-a-half years to suicide within a twenty-mile radius. Most are white, affluent, high achieving males who did not use drugs but hung themselves. Most look like your kids and mine. The last seven have been females – two with guns.”

“It’s like we’re being produced to be test takers. We’re missing the pieces on how to be people.” Aaron, 12 years old

The epidemic of unhappy Strivers is real, but it’s not inevitable. We can do something about it. As Dr. Borba says “all our energy has gone into stretching kids’ cognitive abilities and neglecting their human side – the source of energy, joy, inspiration and meaning. The good news: focusing on character can flip that equation and teach your kids how to find happiness, calm and wonder in the world.“

But we NEED to pay attention… We SHOULD be worried… WE NEED to listen!!

“There’s an amazing amount of depression and anxiety. Seventy percent of my friends are in therapy; forty percent are on medication. We’re hurting but nobody does anything until another kid is suicidal.” Ava, 15 years old.

One last thought that I’d like to finish with. It is terrifying that our children – even the young ones – go to sleep worried about global warming, pandemics, racial violence, school shootings… the list goes on and on. It is even more terrifying that many of them don’t believe their generation will live to see the future. But there is something Dr. Borba’s book reminded me of that I’d like to share with you, and maybe you can share it with your kids.

Years ago a man named Fred Rogers brought optimism, love and hope to families across the country – and in these dark times we could all use a little of his outlook. With each new terror – each bombing, virus, terrorist attack, natural disaster, hate crime or mass shooting we wonder, “what shall we tell our children?” Fred Rogers had the perfect answer:

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of disaster, I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers, so many caring people in this world”.

My belief, and the reason I share this with all of you, is that this current generation of kids is in pain and they are struggling. Dr. Michele Borba (and THRIVERS) is one of the helpers.

Editors Note: all quotes included in this article, including those attributed to individual children and Fred Rogers can be found in THRIVERS: The Surprising Reasons Why Some Kids Struggle and Others Shine

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Across the nation, student mental health is plummeting, major depression rates among teens and young adults are rising faster than among the overall population, and younger children are being impacted. As a teacher, educational consultant, and parent for 40 years, Dr. Michele Borba has never been more worried than she is about this current generation of kids. In THRIVERS, Dr. Borba explains why the old markers of accomplishment (grades, test scores) are no longer reliable predictors of success in the 21st century – and offers 7 teachable traits that will safeguard our kids for the future. She offers practical, actionable ways to develop these Character Strengths (confidence, empathy, self-control, integrity, curiosity, perseverance, and optimism) in children from preschool through high school, showing how to teach kids how to cope today so they can thrive tomorrow. THRIVERS is now available at amazon.com.

Raising Optimistic Children

Last updated on March 15th, 2026 at 08:13 pm

A 2011 study in Pediatrics, examined optimism in 5,634 children who began taking part in the research when they were 12 to 14 years old. The researchers found that the quarter of kids who were the most optimistic had almost half the risk of showing signs of depression compared with those who were least optimistic. Being highly optimistic only had a “modest” link to less heavy substance abuse and antisocial behavior. Likely because substance use and antisocial behavior have strong genetic correlates.

Raising optimistic children has been meaningfully explored by Dr. Martin Seligman since he studied learned helplessness in the 1970’s. In 1991, Seligman published Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life. Since that time, his influence on the field of Positive Psychology has been instrumental in teaching the public that what you think and how you reframe your life experiences impacts your life view as well as your health. People who rate high on optimism live longer, have better mental health and are physically healthier than people who rate high on pessimism.

If you are wishing to encourage optimism in your children consider these time-honored strategies:

1. Help your children set themselves up for success. Participating in tasks, academic activities and physical sports that are within your child’s ability will provide them with positive experiences increasing their self-esteem and allowing them to see themselves as capable.
2. Give specific feedback on what your child does well. Instead of offering general praise, be specific. “You practiced so many multiplication problems that you earned an A on your recent test.” “Your effort and practice earn you better grades.”
3. Validate their feelings offering some strategies for looking more hopefully at the circumstances. “It didn’t feel very good to miss the goal at soccer, but your footwork on the field was excellent. Daddy and I will play more with you in the backyard so you are better prepared for the next time.”
4. Use positive not negative labels. Negative labels lead children to believe they are the label. So use positive labels when talking with and about your child. As an example, when your child exhibits a behavior that is unsuitable such as whining refrain from calling your child a “whiner” and practice using a new tone with your child. “Joey, when you ask for what you want in a positive tone, I can respond better to you.” “Let’s use a happy tone as we talk with one another.”
5. Comment on the bright side. “I know it’s raining so we must play indoors, this is our chance to make a huge train station today.”

Raising optimistic children begins with you. Seeing the positive side of life experiences, learning from mishaps and practicing positive thoughts leads to happier children. You can find more ideas and strategies for raising the optimism quotient in your family by reading Martin Seligman’s book The Optimistic Child.

How to Ensure Your Holiday Dinner Guests Leave Smiling Not Sick

Last updated on December 13th, 2025 at 04:38 pm

Every host wants guests to leave the table with a full stomach, not a stomach bug. Unfortunately, 76 million cases of food-borne diseases occur in the United States each year, and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that 325,000 of those cases result in a trip to the emergency room. This time of year, with heaps of food and extra guests, it’s all too easy to contaminate meals with food-borne bugs or a nasty flu virus.

Luckily, there are a few simple safe-cooking precautions that will keep your friends and family safe and healthy this holiday season. Barbara Kowalcyk, director of food safety at The Center for Foodborne Illness Research & Prevention in Grove City, Pa., shares her tips to help prevent both food poisoning and germ-sharing.

At the Store

Keep raw meats and poultry separate from packaged foods in your cart. The outside of meat packages can be contaminated with bacteria, and touching them means you can easily spread germs and bacteria to other products. “Don’t be afraid to use a plastic bag from the produce department as a glove when handling meats,” says Kowalcyk. “A little precaution now can save you from a big mess later.”

At Home

Proper preparation is the key to safe cooking. Before cooking any meals, clean your hands and all work surfaces. Designate different cutting boards for different types of foods to help prevent cross-contamination. It’s also important to pay attention to what you’re doing. “Don’t go from cutting a chicken to making a salad. Wash your hands,” says Kowalcyk.

Knowing which foods to wash also prevents illness. Always wash the tops of cans and all fruits and vegetables. “People are often surprised to learn that something like a salad can make them sick,” says Kowalcyk. She recommends skipping prepackaged bagged leaves and buying the whole head instead. Remove the outside leaves as well as any with tears, which are the most likely to be contaminated.

Don’t put meat and poultry in the sink. “It doesn’t need to be washed,” says Kowalcyk. Washing raises the risk of contaminating other surfaces in your kitchen. It only takes between three and 10 microbes to start an infection (more than a million can fit on the head of a pin). Just a few drops of dirty water can really wreck havoc on your kitchen. Washing the food won’t kill bacteria, but cooking your food to the proper temperature will.

If You’re Sick

If you’re fighting the flu or a cold, you should stay out of the kitchen altogether. Give instructions to another family member or consider wearing a mask as you prepare the food. If nothing else, wash your hands more often — especially after you cough or sneeze.

In the Oven

Testing meat for color, touch or until juices run clear is not a good way to tell if food is done. “Testing the internal temperature is the only way to know if it’s cooked to a safe temperature,” says Kowalcyk. She recommends you ditch the dial thermometers and pop-up buttons included with some prepackaged turkeys since both may not be calibrated properly. Instead, use a digital thermometer to test meat at its thickest point and poultry at the joint between the thigh and leg.

The United States Department of Agriculture recommends cooking foods to the following minimum temperatures to ensure safe consumption:

• Beef, Pork, Veal & Lamb (steak, chops, roasts): 145 F (62.8 C) and allow to rest for at least 3 minutes
• Ground meats: 160 F (71.1 C)
• Ham, fresh or smoked (uncooked): 145 F (62.8 C) and allow to rest for at least 3 minutes
• Fully Cooked Ham (to reheat): Reheat cooked hams packaged in USDA-inspected plants to 140 F (60 C) and all others to 165 F (73.9 C)
• All Poultry (breasts, whole bird, legs, thighs, and wings, ground poultry, and stuffing): 165 F (73.9 C)
• Eggs: 160 F (71.1 C)
• Fish & Shellfish: 145 F (62.8 C)
• Leftovers: 165 F (73.9 C)
• Casseroles: 165 F (73.9 C)

At the Table

Don’t let food sit out for more than two hours. This includes the time it may be on the counter or table before you serve it. Keep hot foods hot in the oven and cold foods cold in the refrigerator. “Don’t let your foods get to room temperature,” says Kowalcyk. “That’s where bacteria likes to grow. And the longer it sits out, the more you increase your risk of getting sick.”

After the Meal

Transfer warm leftovers to shallow dishes so they’ll cool down evenly and quickly in the fridge. Also keep in mind that the temperature increases in an overstuffed fridge, so you may need to adjust yours for a few days after a big meal to make sure it stays at a safe 40 F.

The Next Day

Everyone loves leftovers, but not everyone should reach for the cold turkey. Those vulnerable to illness — young children, pregnant women and people with chronic conditions — should reheat leftovers to 165 F before eating them. “Most people will be OK, but it’s always better to be safe than sorry,” says Kowalcyk.

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Editor’s Note: This post first appeared on Pediatric Safety in November of 2010. The chart has been updated to include the most current information available on the minimum safe internal temperatures for food. If you’re preparing dinner for guests, print a copy and keep it handy. Wishing all of our readers a happy and healthy Thanksgiving!

Preventing, Detecting and Treating TMJ in Children

Last updated on December 13th, 2025 at 04:35 pm

Almost everyone, including children, experiences soreness and discomfort in the jaw from time to time, and most times these symptoms fade and disappear in a few short days. Those other few instances where the pain lingers and increases should raise alarm for parents. Continued soreness and tightness in the jaw as well as difficulty chewing, smiling and even breathing are all symptoms of TMJ, or temporomandibular joint, disorder.

The TMJ is the joint that connects the lower jaw to the skull. Overuse or irritation to the joint can result in headaches, neck aches, and jaw or face pain, problems chewing or biting, popping and clicking sounds when opening and closing the mouth and extreme cases cause the jaw to lock open or closed. TMJ can occur to anyone at any age, but is especially prevalent in teenage girls.

Unfortunately, it is often unclear what causes TMJ disorders in children. Contributing factors include can include: stress, clenching or grinding of the jaw or other oral or overall health issues. Stress frequently results in the grinding or tightening of the jaw in children. Many do not even realize they are doing it as it becomes habit. Also, if your child has a bad bite, muscle problems or has had face or jaw trauma, they are more likely to experience the discomfort or TMJ.

Thankfully, there are many treatment options to relieve the pain of TMJ disorder.

• The simplest fix, depending on the severity of the condition, is to encourage your child to rest their jaw for a few days. You can assist in this by having soft foods for meals and snacks, and discouraging aggravating activities such as gum chewing, open-mouth yawning and clenching or grinding. Also apply ice or heat as needed to relieve pain temporarily.
• For the more involved cases, further treatment will need to be explored. Dentists may provide a device for your child to wear at night to minimize grinding or prescribe medication to relax the jaw muscles. Braces or corrective dentistry may be needed if the disorder is stemming from a misaligned bite.
• Rarely, surgery will be recommended.

To help your child avoid TMJ disorder, bring to their attention bad grinding or clenching habits. The habits often coincide with certain behaviors – being upset, studying for tests, etc – so teach your child to pinpoint their trigger behaviors so they can consciously combat the bad habits. Allowing plenty of time for exercise and play will also help keep stress levels down.

If you think your child is exhibiting symptoms of TMJ, contact a local dentist today. The earlier TMJ can be treated, the better.

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