Improve Your Young Child’s Sleep

Last updated on May 3rd, 2025 at 06:02 pm

As parents know all too well, young children are notorious for resisting sleep. Just the mention of bedtime can sometimes set off a toddler tantrum.

Help your little bundle of energy head to dreamland and get the rest he needs with these toddler sleep tips.

Create a quiet routine

A game of chase or dancing around to music may seem like a surefire way to tire out your toddler, but a quiet, soothing routine before bed is a better choice for sleep success. Try reading a story together or giving your child a bath right before bedtime. Practice makes perfect, and repeating your bedtime ritual every night will help signal to your toddler that it’s time to get ready for sleep.

Be consistent

To establish a good sleep pattern, try to put your toddler to bed at the same time every night. Your tot may resist going to bed (can you blame him for not wanting to miss out on the after-hours fun?), but remaining firm about the rules will help a fuss-free bedtime become the norm instead of the exception.

Give your toddler a “lovey”

Letting your toddler sleep with her favorite blanket, teddy bear, or toy will help comfort her, especially if she wakes up in the middle of the night. Let her choose her lovey, but make sure what she picks is safe — avoid toys or stuffed animals with ribbons, buttons, or anything that could be considered a choking hazard.

Set up the bedroom for success

A room that’s quiet, dark, and set to a comfortable temperature will encourage your toddler to fall — and stay — asleep. Before you tuck your child in, check that she has everything she needs to get through the night. This will decrease the chance that she’ll call you back to her bedroom. If she does cry out for you, resist the urge to rush in immediately. Instead, wait 15 seconds before reentering the room. If she calls out multiple times, gradually increase the amount of time you wait to go in, giving her the chance to fall back asleep without your help.

Keep an eye on naptime

Most young children this age need between 12 and 14 hours of sleep each day, which can be split up between nighttime sleeping and daytime naps. But snoozing too late in the day can cause your toddler to have difficulty dozing off in the evening. If this is the case, slowly inch back the time of day she naps (a drastic change can completely throw off her schedule). If she goes to day care, try to have naptime there and at home be as consistent as possible.

Following these guidelines should help bedtime go more smoothly over time. Of course, life can sometimes get in the way, but if it does, just aim to get back on track the next evening.

6 Things New Parents Need to Know About Car Safety

Last updated on January 17th, 2026 at 07:02 pm

As a new parent, baby safety is your top priority – and keeping your newborn safe in the car is most likely on your mind. Here’s what you need to know about safety on the road.

1. Be car-seat safe. You know that an infant car seat will help protect your child in the event of a crash. But make sure the seat has a sturdy harness system, is placed rear-facing, and has padding around the sides to support your baby. Also check that your car seat is installed safely. If you’re unsure, find a certified car seat inspector near you at SeatCheck.org.

2. Buckle up, always. Speaking of car seats, your baby should always be in one when you’re in a vehicle. It might be more fun to hold her and buckle up together, but an infant (or a child) should never ride in your arms.

3. Babies in the back. You might be tempted to put your baby’s car seat up front so you can keep a closer eye on him while you’re driving, but don’t. The backseat is the safest and best for babies and children, who could easily get hurt by a deployed air bag if you were to get into an accident.

4. Watch the windows. To keep your baby’s fingers from ever getting pinched, always look before closing automatic windows. Keep them closed by turning on the child window locks.

5. Never talk or text while driving. A whopping 78 percent of moms admit to talking on their phones while driving (and 26 percent say they text or check email). You’ve heard it a million times, but here it is again: Never use your phone to talk or text while you drive – it’s just not worth the risk.

6. Always bring your baby with you. Don’t leave your baby alone in the car while you pop into stores to run errands, or for any reason at all. Children’s bodies heat up faster than adults’, and the temperature inside your car can jump 20°F in just 10 minutes! That puts your baby at serious risk for overheating, and even having heatstroke, or worse.

Middle School Food Allergy Blues

Last updated on September 7th, 2024 at 06:27 pm

Remember those long, warm summer days when your child would wake up and come running into your bedroom to say good morning? That faint pitter patter, shuffling mixed with the familiar scent that only belongs to your child and nobody else’s? Hours of cuddles, hugs, late breakfasts and kisses- endless, silly kisses. Then, the beginning of Middle School and all of that just STOPS. No more affection in front of their friends or asking your child if they want another hug. Suddenly, your child is their own person and with food allergies, this new found individuality offers a brand new level of anxiety to keep under control as a parent.

Time to Switch Gears

This will begin a new phase to your life as a food allergy parent. No more “helicopter parent” because this may cause your child embarrassment- I mean, who else starts Middle School and has a parent tagging along all of the time? Before opting to be a living extension of your child, first consider how your child will feel about it as well. Think back to when you started Middle School and ask what would have been acceptable for your parent to be a part of during the school year. As difficult as this will be, I promise that Middle School events are far less food-oriented so that in itself will allow both of you a little extra breathing room. After all, this also means a new learning curve for your child and how they will continue to handle their own safety too.

Ask Your Child’s Permission First

I know this may seem like the opposite of what you have done (ever!) but trust me, this one is especially important to both of you. Rather than declaring that you have signed up for every single committee, every function and all things that may include even a stitch of food, sit down with your child first. Find a time that seems to be comfortable for both of you – that can also offer an extra bonus of bonding time as well. Our son seems to be more willing to talk to us when we go to say good night and he’s winding down from his day. It’s one of the few times during the day when he is not rushing, not stressing about a school assignment or talking to his friends. Sit on your child’s bed, begin with another subject and then ease into what they would like to see you be a part of.

Become a Silent Super Parent

There are ways to still be the helicopter parent, but in disguise. Once you and your child have established the new limits, begin to include the teachers. Many teachers are already feeling overwhelmed with the large number of students in their classrooms. When it comes to a child with life-threatening food allergies, they are always looking for extra back-up. Offer to bring in some of the foods for any class festivities as well as extra wipes. I have often joked that I will be the quiet person in the back of the room collecting garbage and silently wiping down all of the desks. It sounds funny but schools are always asking for wipes so why not tackle two things at once? Help a teacher, keep your child safe and go home knowing that the potential for an allergic reaction has been limited.

Transform into the Cool Parent

Sometimes, this even makes you the cool parent without even trying. Many parents work and many children of those parents often wish that their mother or father was going with them to these fun school outings. Never once have I been asked why I chaperone so many trips and so often. What I have had positive experience with very often include my son’s classmates approaching me, saying hello and asking me if I have any of those “awesome goodies that I had like last time”. They don’t ask of they are allergy-friendly and we don’t tell- but my son is always the first to offer to share even though he cannot have whatever his friends are having. It’s like this with adults too- we all want whatever someone else has that’s different. Thus begins leaving the label of allergy parent and becoming the cool parent.

It’s Ok to STILL Worry

Any parent, allergic or not, will always worry about their child regardless of what happens- always. Remember that this is natural and this does not mean that you are over-protective or under skilled as a parent.  When it comes to any situation with your child, it’s always better to check and double-check until you know that the situation is as controlled as it can be by you. Just remember that the new found “cool parent” gets better results if this is handled a bit more calmly rather than when you initially became a food allergy parent. (Unsure? Let me reshare how it most likely was then continue to read- just click here.)

Remember- just as you are getting comfortable with this new found parenting and food allergy freedom, High School will begin! 🙂

Choosing the Right Chores for Kids of Any Age

Last updated on September 7th, 2024 at 06:27 pm

Several years ago I learned a Mommy Secret from my girlfriend about kids’ chores that I’ve never forgot. Cindy and I were busy chatting away when she announced to her kids: “Chore time!” As quick as a wink they jumped up from playing and scurried to their kitchen where they proceeded to unload dishes, and put clean ones in the cupboard. And they did so without an ounce of help or uttering one complaint. When finished they turned for their mom’s sanction (she nodded approvingly), and then grinned and ran back to play. (Oh, by the way: her kids were three and five years old. Cross my heart!)

So what was the secret to the mom’s success? Believe me, I asked her, and my girlfriend shared these three simple secrets and I used them that afternoon with my own kids. 1. Cindy chose tasks that fit her kids’ developmental abilities. 2. She planned for chore success. (For example: She bought no-break plastic dishes, and cleared a bottom cupboard so they could put dishes away without help). 3. She first modeled exactly how to do a chore, and then made sure they could do it alone. The result: success! You can use these same secrets with your children to boost their helping attitudes. Here are a few chores for kids that are appropriate for different ages.

Chores for Toddlers

It’s never too early to begin, but let’s be realistic. Do not expect a toddler to do any “chore” on his own, but you can gently encourage his helping spirit. Here’s how:

• Toddlers love to help and learn best by copying and working next to you. So purchase a pint-size broom, rake, or vacuum (that looks like Mommy’s). Your little one can grab his broom and copy you.
• Set out a special box, bin or basket for your toddler to help you put his toys away. He won’t do this alone, but would love to help you do the task (for a few seconds anyway).

Chores For Preschoolers

The important Mommy Secret for this age is if you expect this age of child to do chores first alone, they are likely to give up in frustration. So if you want your preschooler to succeed (or really any age child), first show them exactly how to do the task right. They probably will still need your guidance. Here are a few appropriate chores:

• Set and clear the table and fold napkins: Be on the lookout for placemats that provide inked-in outlines of a fork, knife, spoon and plate. Some moms make them by drawing utensil outlines using permanent black marking pens on construction paper and then covering them with clear laminating paper.
• Sponge off tables and counters: Hand him a damp sponge and a squirt bottle filled with water and a bit of your favorite cleaner and let him go to town cleaning away
• Pick up toys: Provide a box, basket, or bin for your child to put away his toys
• Recycling: He can stack magazines and papers (do specify exactly where you want items placed) and empty small wastebaskets.
• Gardening: Fill a water can and designate certain plants that should be watered.

Chores for School-Age Kids

School-age kids are ready to help out in the household as well as some yard work. Go through each new chore step by step with your child so that he clearly knows how to do it. Then observe him doing it at least once to make sure he can handle it.

• Routine household chores: Set and clear table, put dishes in dishwasher, put clean ones away, vacuum, dust, sweep.
• Laundry: Gradually increase the repertoire until your child can do the majority alone.
• Meals: Make their lunch and be responsible for cooking one part of evening meal
• Pet care: Feeding, taking them on walks, brushing, bathing, cleaning out cage.
• Gardening: Weeding, watering plants, raking leaves, mowing the lawn, sweeping patio
• Personal bedrooms: They should slowly become their soul responsibility including dusting, making the bed and changing sheets.
• Laundry duties: Putting his dirty clothes in hamper, emptying hamper, folding and sorting lights and darks.

Chores for Preteens and Teens

In a few short years this same kid is probably will be living on his own. So think of assigning chores to help prepare him for independent living.

• Cooking: Learning a few basic cooking recipes to cook alone
• Laundry: Completely doing own laundry
• Bathroom: Cleaning their shower, toilet, tub (My kids’ roommates have thanked me)
• Car care: When she gets that license make her responsible for maintaining car appearance washing exterior, cleaning windows, filling it with gas, even taking in for service.

It’s never too early for your child to help out with the household chores. (Okay, do wait until your child is at least out of diapers and can talk). But the fact is the sooner you begin chores, the easier it is be to nurture your child’s responsibility muscle. Remember to choose tasks that match your child’s abilities, show your child exactly what you expect, and finally stand back. The real mommy secret is this: Don’t do any task your child can do alone. Kids needs to see themselves as responsible family contributors.

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Dr Borba’s book The Big Book of Parenting Solutions: 101 Answers to Your Everyday Challenges and Wildest Worries, is one of the most comprehensive parenting book for kids 3 to 13. This down-to-earth guide offers advice for dealing with children’s difficult behavior and hot button issues including biting, tantrums, cheating, bad friends, inappropriate clothing, sex, drugs, peer pressure and much more. Each of the 101 challenging parenting issues includes specific step-by-step solutions and practical advice that is age appropriate based on the latest research. The Big Book of Parenting Solutions is available at amazon.com

Stimming and Special Needs: The Good, The Bad and the Flappy

Last updated on May 19th, 2024 at 01:34 pm

How do you react when when your dog greets you at the door with a wagging tail or your cat cuddles up to you and purrs loudly? You might think it’s cute or that the animal is just expressing its feelings. Do you ever get angry? do you ever think your pet is acting weird? Of course not, it’s just the natural way they use body language or their voice box.

Now think about how most people react to a child having a tantrum, kicking and screaming. How do people respond when a child with special needs is flapping their hands,  spinning a toy car’s wheels or banging their head against a wall. Some people get downright angry about these behaviors, especially when they happen in public. But the child is just expressing his or herself, using the body language and sound that come naturally. While some of these may be harmless, many of these behaviors may be considered annoying or distracting and others can be downright dangerous.

Let’s go back to our beloved pets. A puppy naturally needs to chew, so it finds a shoe and chews it to bits. The puppy isn’t trying to destroy your property or do anything to harm you personally, it is just a teething baby that needs to chew. A good pet owner will simply hide all the shoes and introduce chew toys, substituting a more appropriate way to fulfill the puppy’s need to chew. A cat needs to scratch, it is simply instinct as well as a way to mark territory and sharpen claws. Unless the human wants shredded furniture it’s a good idea to provide a scratching post and train the cat to use it instead of the couch to satisfy its need to scratch.

So how can we allow our special needs kids to express themselves without getting injured or doing damage to themselves or to property? Just like with our animal companions, we substitute a more appropriate behavior that satisfies the same need.

• If a child seems to need to jump, a small trampoline might be just the ticket.
• If a child needs to chew, fashionable chew-able accessories are available.
• As for hand-flapping, if it is an expression of happiness or excitement and it is not injuring the child, anyone else or anyone’s property then why change it?

Photo provided by Kfagan6;  CC license

My Unusual New Year’s Wish for My Children

Last updated on January 8th, 2024 at 12:45 pm

Most parents can easily blurt out wonderful, inspiring wishes for their children for the coming year- health, happiness, maybe a better year in school. But this year as I look at my kids, I realize I’m not wishing for things to change– In fact, I’m wishing they stay the same.

Do I want them to be happy, healthy…of course I do, always. But something is finally becoming clear to me –something my children have actually taught me over the years (and I will give anything for them to continue to do so for many years to come). These children and the path they’re on – they are wonderful and perfect exactly the way they are… and being part of their journey…I’m the one who gets “better”.  It’s a wonderful feeling when you are a parent and you realize that you have been doing your “job” but it’s even better when you realize that all along, your children have actually been teaching you how to do your job.

I realized that part of being a parent is to learn to adapt, good or bad. This also means that sometimes the adapting is something a parent has to be taught by their child and not the other way around. But what happens when you have a child that does things outside of the box and makes you think that maybe you need to change your thinking, even if it’s not what you were always told to do? What if you realize that your child has actually told you (in a roundabout way) that it’s actually not your way or the highway?

I have learned from my children that there is no list of rules that works with every single child exactly the same way. I have learned that sometimes you do have to give in and do something that is the total opposite of what you always swore you would never do as a parent. I have realized that just because we always have “grown-up time” does not mean that “children’s time” is any less important. Your child grows up and learns to be their own, unique person. They show you that sometimes it’s ok to eat cold pizza for breakfast or to have ice cream for dinner an hour past bedtime. You have to bend and just say ok sometimes.

Thinking back, what do you remember more – the rule that your parents had about going to bed on time or the time when they actually let you eat cookies in your bed past your bedtime and not brush your teeth? I am willing to bet that you seem to remember the second choice.

As our children grow and enlighten us, we begin to realize how short life is. Change does not have to be a bad thing all of the time.  Step into the unknown and just go with it. This is how ice cream was invented and this is how The Nobel Peace Prize is won. In today’s society, people are so fast to judge others that they don’t stop to think about all of the “what ifs”. So many of our children today are deemed hyperactive or unfocused because they don’t want to be a typically developing child…what do you think would happen if Mozart or Albert Einstein was alive today as a child?

Embrace your children and let them ask questions. Listen to them when they disagree with you, don’t shut them out. If they are coloring outside of the lines, don’t correct them. Learn to respect them, even when they are very young because children know when people do not respect them. Don’t be embarrassed if they want to know about sex or why people are different colors. They learn from you. The only time you should be (embarrassed? concerned?) is when they don’t ask questions or they don’t want to know. Love them, no matter what.

So this year, my wish for them is to continue to help me grow as they do; to help me become a better person, a better parent and better at things that I didn’t even know I needed to be better at.

I wish with all of my heart that they never stop questioning me because this would mean they had given up and refuse to think about the people they want to become.

And that is one thing that I never wish to happen to them.

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