Last updated on November 2nd, 2018 at 11:10 pm
Halloween time is an exciting time for parents and kids. Halloween means parents and children decorating houses and lawns, picking out costumes and planning the inevitable trick or treating. Halloween time and specifically Halloween night is an exciting time for EMS and hospitals …but not in a good way. Exciting to us means BUSY and there are things that we bring into the ER every year that makes us and the ER staff members shake our heads …things that hopefully – with these safety tips – parents will now think twice about.
- Candy and food allergies: We all know we should check the candy our kids get and make sure it looks safe, but did you know you should also check for contents that could cause allergic reactions. Many candies have nuts and they get missed.
- Costumes and face paint irritants. Face paint is great and looks cool but the time to test it is not on Halloween night when it’s dark and you can’t see any reactions like a rash or breathing problems caused by full costume. Colored contact lenses should be added to this list. Kids like to wear them with costumes and if doing so should be made aware of what to watch for like irritations and damage to their eyes and taught how to put them on and take them out properly.
- Real Props. Cuts, pokes, scrapes and real trauma from kids and adults using REAL PROPS. Using a plastic knife or pitchfork is ok. Using real knives and pitchforks should not happen at all but especially around children. A no brainer…but it happens.
- Letting kids wander alone. Letting your child wonder alone is your choice, all I can add to this is please think about who is going to speak for your child in the ER if YOU are not around.
- Broken Bones. Kids should have costumes they can move in and enjoy themselves in. If your child cannot walk correctly or has trouble with then it should be changed so as to avoid trip, falls and possible broken bones.
- Carving Pumpkins. Many children end up in the ER every year with serious cuts from carving pumpkins with sharp objects that are not meant for carving or were left unattended. Make sure kids are supervised and tools put away.
- Using Real Candles in Decorations. Real candles add a certain effect to the decoration but also bring a danger of surrounding objects catching fire if decorations are bumped or knocked over or left unattended. There are many brands of colored lights that can be put in decorations that bring a great effect and pose no threat to any one or home.
- Hayrides. Every child loves a hayride and they are great but like any ride and everyone should be secure, not just children. Injuries are mostly from falls and can be serious. Security, proper seating and slow speed should be requirements.
- Home Decorations. Decorating your home for Halloween can involve dark or no lighting and lawn inflatables. A dark home with ropes all over the place securing decorations do not mix well with trick or treaters that will trip and fall and possible injure themselves. There is nothing wrong with decorations, just try to make sure you don’t create a hazard at the same time.
All of the things outlined above can be avoided with planning and supervision. However, all of the things above become more possible when drinking and alcohol are involved. AAA and State Farm consider Halloween night one of the biggest drinking nights of the year and the deadliest night of the year for pedestrians with the rate of pedestrians struck by cars doubling. So please be careful and have fun!
Thanks!
Last updated on August 22nd, 2018 at 03:37 pm
Preschoolers aren’t exactly known for their patience and self-control. Have you ever counted how many times a day your young child says, “mom” or “dad” followed by some sort of question or request? Although preschoolers are still learning skills like patience, research is teaching us that how we interact with them may help them learn these lessons.
In a recent study, researchers followed children and their families from the time they were 7 months old until they were 4.5 years old. They wanted to delve deep into how the relationship between parents and children developed early in a child’s life.
Then, at 4 years of age, the children were asked to complete several tasks which assessed their skill at self-regulation. This included tasks that required patience, deliberation and restraint—all tasks that tend to still be difficult for young children.
What the researchers found was fascinating. Children who had close, mutually responsive relationships with their parents (particularly mothers), were more likely to regulate themselves better. They showed more restraint, patience and self-control. Not surprisingly, families with close relationships also used forced discipline less. In other words, in the context of a mutually responsive relationship, forceful discipline is not needed because the children respond to more subtle tactics.
You may wonder what it is about a responsive relationship that helps kids learn self-regulation better. The “old school” model of parenting would have parents force submission of kids by demand and physical force in some cases. Why does a mutually responsive relationship seem to work better?
It all comes down to trust.
Once a child feels that their parent understands their needs, will strive to meet them, and respects their feelings, a certain level of trust develops between parent and child. When this trust is firmly established, the child is much more likely to comply with the parents requests, even if it is difficult, because they trust that what the parent tells them is in their own best interest.
Children in these close relationships respond quickly to parents requests without the threat of force because they have come to trust in their parents’ care and respect for them. This is very important news in light of the well-publicized study of spanking in which many parents were found to spank their children for seemingly minor misbehaviors. Years of research has shown that exposure to this type of forceful discipline (i.e., corporal punishment) actually has the opposite of its intended effect—children tend to comply less and begin to show even more disruptive behavior.
Forceful discipline essentially breaks down the relationship of trust that otherwise could be established between parents and children. Forced compliance through tactics like spanking robs children of the skills they need to learn to regulate themselves.
Helping children learn to self-regulate is one of the major parenting goals in the early years of parenting. That, however, does not mean that it is easy. What this research reminds us is that self-regulation does not develop in a vacuum, but in the context of a supportive, responsive relationship. Every time parents are patient, responsive and kind, they are laying the foundation for a harmonious relationship that will reap benefits for you and your child years later.
Last updated on July 30th, 2018 at 02:27 pm
Ways to get your baby moving
Lay your baby down on their back so they can kick their legs.- Pulling, pushing, grasping and playing with other people are great ways to practise different kinds of movements.
- Once your baby has started crawling, let them crawl around the floor, but make sure it’s safe first – see our crawling safety checklist.
- Playing outdoors helps your baby learn about their surroundings.
- You can take your baby swimming from a very young age – there’s no need to wait until they’ve been vaccinated.
See Start4Life for more activity tips for babies.
Why tummy time is important
Tummy time helps to build the muscles your baby needs for sitting and crawling. You can start doing tummy time from birth by lying your baby on your chest – but only do this when you’re wide awake and unlikely to fall asleep.
Little and often is best to begin with. Gradually increase the amount of time you do this day by day. Then, when your baby is ready, try doing tummy time on the floor. If your baby has difficulty lifting their head, you can roll up a towel and put it under their armpits. Put some toys nearby for them to reach out to.
Only do tummy time when your baby is awake and alert, and you’re there to keep an eye on them.
Baby bouncers, walkers and seats
It’s important that your baby doesn’t spend too much time in:
- baby walkers or bouncers – these encourage babies to stand on their tiptoes and can delay walking if your baby uses them a lot
- baby carriers and seats – long periods in reclining carriers or seats, or seats that prop your baby in a sitting position, can delay your baby’s ability to sit up on their own
If you do use a baby walker, bouncer or seat, it’s best to use them for no more than 20 minutes at a time.
Physical activity for toddlers
Once your child is walking, they should be physically active for at least 180 minutes (three hours) a day, spread throughout the day.
- Let your toddler walk with you rather than always using the buggy.
- Toddlers and young children love going to the park, where they can climb and swing or just run around.
- Toys your child can pick up and move around will help improve their co-ordination and develop the muscles in their arms and hands.
- Involve your toddler in household tasks like unpacking shopping, tidying or sorting washing.
- Teach your child songs with actions and encourage them to dance to music.
Watching TV or using a tablet for long periods – or being strapped into a buggy, car seat or highchair – isn’t good for young children.
If you need to make a long car journey, consider taking a break and getting your child out of their seat for a bit.
See physical activity guidelines for children under five.
Enjoy being active together
It’s good to join in with your child’s active play when you can. Have fun showing them how to do new things like running and hopping. Being active together shows your child that activity is enjoyable.
You’re a role model for your child so stay active yourself and try to meet the physical activity guidelines for adults.
There may be activities for parents and children at your local leisure centre or Sure Start Children’s Centre.
Activity for young children with a disability
All babies and young children need to be active, including children with a long-term condition or disability, unless their health professionals give you different advice.
Just like other children, they will enjoy being active and it will help their development. You may need to adapt some activities to suit your child.
Scope has ideas for games all children can play, and the Contact a Family advice service** offers information on caring for a disabled child (in the UK).
Coping with a very active toddler
It can be exhausting keeping up with a toddler who is always on the go. It may help if you:
- keep to a daily routine – routine can help if your child is restless or difficult; it can also help you stay calm and cope with the strain
- dedicate time to your child – make sure there are times each day when you give them your full attention
- avoid difficult situations – for example, keep shopping trips short
- try to go out every day – go to a park, playground or other safe, open space where your child can run around and use up energy
- set small goals – help your child to sit still and concentrate for a very short time, perhaps on a book or new toy, then gradually build it up
Does my child have attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)?
At times you may wonder if your non-stop toddler has ADHD. But only about 2% of children in the UK have ADHD**. It’s more likely that your child is just a healthy, energetic toddler.
If you’re worried about how active your child is, talk to your health visitor (*nurse specialist/midwife) or GP (*physician).
Learn more about ADHD or visit ADDISS: National Attention Deficit Disorder Information and Support Service.
Editor’s Note:
* Clarification Provided for our U.S. Readers
** US Reference Information:
- The American Psychiatric Association (APA) says that 5 percent of American children have ADHD. But the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) puts the number at more than double that. The CDC says that 11 percent of American children, ages 4 to 17, had the attention disorder as of 2011.
- UNICEF-USA is a charity that helps to protect US children and support children with disabilities
From www.nhs.uk
>
Last updated on June 22nd, 2018 at 01:48 am
The social-emotional development of our nation’s children is foremost in our minds. We have all hugged our children and expressed gratitude for their health and well-being. We pray for those families who now are hurting so deeply. Some of whom are very close to our own hearts.
When life is difficult or complicated and our children are in a stress-response, we need to co-regulate with them. Our words and actions can help the children “Find Calm”. What we say, think and do in these intense or painful moment matters.
Co-regulating is about being present and ready to sit with the child in their fear, hurt or pain. Here are 9 ways you can say, “Your feelings matter”. “Together, we will get through this.” Feel free to grab these mantras if one rings true for you. Let us share some love and kindness when moments get tough.
- “We can embrace your BIG feelings. Let’s breathe through them together”
- “Let’s move through your BIG feelings together
- “Your feelings truly matter to me”
Let’s choose how many minutes you will be in these BIG feelings.”- “You have the power to feel deeply and still be balanced and calm.”
- “Help me better understand how you feel.”
- “Let’s Be Calm Together.”
- “I am right here with you. We will work through this together.”
- “We can work through these intense feelings together.”
****************************************************************************************************************************
Written for real parents with anxious, angry and over-the-top kids, Bloom is a brain-based approach to parenting all children. Taking its lead from neuroscience and best practices in early childhood mental health, it offers parents, teachers and care providers the words, thoughts and actions to raise calm, confident children, while reducing the need for consequences and punishment. The first book of its kind, it provides pages full of printable mantras you can carry with you, hang on your fridge or use in your classroom to raise emotionally competent kids. Stop second-guessing the way you handle misbehaviors, and learn why they occur in the first place. Bloom is available at amazon.com
Last updated on June 6th, 2018 at 11:55 am
Many parents are concerned about letting their children begin to surf the Internet or start using social media or online games such as Fortnite, the latest craze for kids. There is good reason for their concern. A common question is, “at what age should parents let their young children begin using technology?”
The bad news is that there is no specific age that works for all kids. There is a minimum legal age for people to use most social media sites such as SnapChat and Instagram in the United States. According to the Children’s Online Privacy Protection Rule (COPPA), anyone using those apps must be at least 13 years of age.
The law is not aimed at punishing children who use such sites before they are 13, but is designed to protect them from data mining and influence by advertisers and companies who provide in-app purchases. The Federal Trade Commission, who enforces COPPA, ensures that companies comply with the act or face disciplinary action.
As parents, my wife and I never pre-determined at what age we would allow our daughter to start using social media. As a cybersafety advocate myself, I know what can happen to children who go online. While parents often concern themselves with cyberbullying, there are other serious concerns, such as sextortion, where kids are forced to give explicit images and videos of themselves to other people. I personally know people who have experienced this and I know how devastating it can be to families.
My daughter is in middle school now and was the last of her crowd to be allowed to use Snapchat. She was missing out on many group activities by not being online. Everything was discussed online, so she had no idea the conversations were going on and ended up missing out on a lot. Her group of friends would talk about meeting at the bowling alley or going swimming. She only found out later, when they were discussing how much fun they had together, what she had missed.
When we decided to let her use Snapchat, we set some very specific ground rules:
- She was to “friend” me on the app.
- She was not allowed to speak with people she didn’t know in real life.
- I had the sign-on credentials for the account, which was created using an email address that I no longer used, but could still access.
- Her privacy settings were set at the most restrictive level.
- She was to hand over her tablet if requested. Her cellphone was not a smartphone, so she could not download apps onto it, but she could send texts.
The first lesson taught in business management school or in officer’s training in the military is to never give someone an order than you know cannot or will not be followed. At some point, your child will most likely start using social media. Prohibiting them from doing it is not really an option in our society. They are likely to ignore your wishes and that is a recipe for disaster. When they expect to get into trouble for using social media in the first place, it makes it even more difficult for them to come to you if something bad happens.
Here are some tips on what parents can do to transition their children into social media when the time comes:
- Talking
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Let your children know what is and what is not acceptable online. Teach them what to do if someone asks them for inappropriate pictures, to share personal information, such as where they live or for their email address or phone number. If a problem does happen, be sure to talk with your child and not at your child. Talking at them is the surest way to get them to tune out your message, as well meant as it may be.
- Take Steps to Protect Your Own Device
Part of the concern is the amount of money children, especially very young children, might spend online. If you have stored credit card data on a device that you let your child play with it can definitely hurt your wallet since they can make purchases without your knowledge or approval. There are a few things you can do to avoid this. You can decide not to store your purchasing information on your device, or you allow them to make limited purchases by simply purchasing gift cards and loading into your account as you deem acceptable.
- Set the Example
Children, especially younger children, pay attention to their surroundings. Far more than most adults would expect. If they see their parents doing something, then they believe it’s okay for them to do it as well. So, set the example for them about how people should behave online.
- Be Proactive & Stay Informed
Technology changes on a daily basis and parents need to keep on top of the changes. School districts may be reluctant to discuss cybersafety issues. Encourage them to do so before an incident happens. On your own, find reliable sources of information regarding cyberbullying, inappropriate apps for young kids, etc. Two great resources are the Cyberbullying Research Center and Common Sense Media.
By taking the steps discussed here, your children are less likely to have a dangerous incident. An ounce of prevention really is worth an immeasurable amount of cure.
The ability to know how to use technology is not the same thing as knowing how to use it wisely.
Wisdom only comes with experience and by definition as young children, their ages exclude that possibility. That’s why it’s up to us as parents to decide how to guide them, no matter what age they are.
Last updated on February 8th, 2018 at 11:30 pm
When my child was born she ended up with some potentially serious medical conditions. They turned out to be minor – really minor – but could have been much, much worse. The other day one of them reared its ugly head (and I mean ugly). Frankly, I had almost forgotten about this particular bugaboo but just like riding a bike, it all came back to me.
When it hit, I could hardly breathe. It seemed that all the progress we had made went right out the window, or maybe I had just imagined it all. I couldn’t believe that I had actually let myself forget all that we had been through and I was angry with myself because I had dared to let my guard down. Realistically you can’t really live with your guard up 24/7 year after year. I know that now that the moment has passed…
So, here are some things that help me get through when it seems that we have taken a step backwards:
Keep it in perspective
Things may not going well today but that doesn’t automatically mean they will continue to spiral down tomorrow, or next week. Everyone deals with ups and downs, no matter how perfect their lives may seem on social media.
Get yourself help
Ask friends or family to take on some tasks to lighten your load, or outsource the work if you can afford it. If the prognosis is truly dire, seek professional counseling or a support group even if you think you don’t need it. Parents and caregivers of kids with special needs sometimes have to be superhuman, but superhuman still has the word human in it. Sometimes we humans need help.
Take care of yourself
Eating and showering may seem pointless when dealing with your child’s medical crisis (no matter how small) but you can’t take care of your child if you don’t take care of yourself. Find time to keep up with good nutrition, basic hygiene and sleep. These things will help with your stress level and overall health so you can be at your best for your child.
Find your outlet
Don’t feel pressured to load up on yoga classes or whatever the latest exercise trend might be…unless yoga works for you, of course. Maybe washing your car is therapeutic for you, or you feel truly relaxed while brushing your dog. Find what helps you unwind, whatever that looks like for you. And when you find it, let me know what it is because I am still looking for mine!
« Previous Page — Next Page »
