Kids’ Cavities: Nature or Nurture?
Last updated on May 3rd, 2026 at 02:42 pm
I know of an interesting family, and I am sure there are many like them. The wife has never had a cavity, and no one in her family ever did. The husband, though his teeth are straight and white, had to have fillings at a young age and still deals with cavities as a grown man, despite good hygiene. Their two preschool-aged children eat the same diet, drink the same fluoridated water, go to the same dentist for checkups and cleanings and have the same parents brushing and flossing their teeth every night and at naptime. Yet, one of the children has already had several fillings and a silver crown, while the other has perfect checkups every time. This scenario prompts an important question. Are cavities a matter of nature or nurture?
As with any great debate, the answer is hardly one or the other. Let’s take a look at the roles both nature and nurture play in oral health. By nature, I mean heredity, or genes. By nurture, I mean habits and diet. Can a parent with “bad teeth” pass along the propensity for cavities? Is it worth it to get cleanings and brush regularly if you have “bad teeth”?
The truth is, nature does play a role. Our heredity influences about everything about us, including our oral risk factors like how our saliva is composed, how much of it our bodies make and the composition of our teeth. Some people may be more prone to problems like enamel defects, crowding, early or late eruption of teeth, bite issues or dry mouth, but careful maintenance can usually overcome them. “Bad” genes are hardly a death sentence, and caring for your teeth is far from futile, no matter how blessed or disadvantaged your smile genes may be!
That’s because nurture is hugely important in oral health. Whether you inherited “strong” teeth or “weak” ones, how you care for yourself is the number one factor in your oral health. You may have to work harder to avoid cavities and gum disease than others, but good habits do pay off.
So what things can you do to make the most of “nature” and “nurture” your family’s smiles?
- Watch your mouth. You may have the germs that cause dental caries in your mouth, but you weren’t born that way and neither were your kids. The bacteria that feed on sugars in our mouths, producing acid and ultimately leading to tooth decay, are passed from person to person. Don’t share utensils, drinks or extra sloppy kisses with your kids to avoid sharing these cavity-causing cooties.
- Set the example. You may know by now if the genes fairies blessed you with good teeth, but it’s likely you won’t find out until later with your kids. Either way, you and your kids should be drinking plenty of water, brushing, flossing and seeing the dentist regularly. People with good teeth still only get one (adult) set, just like everyone else!
- Pay close attention. If you already know you or your spouse has a family history of dental problems, be on the lookout for similar symptoms in your kids. If you see crowding, irregularities in enamel or another problem, be sure to mention your concern and the family history to your dentist. These days, with dental sealants, interceptive orthodontics and so many other preventive treatments, a little vigilance can go a long way to keep smiles healthy.
Why Parents Need to Know About 764
Last updated on March 15th, 2026 at 08:15 pm
Previously for Pediatric Safety, I have written on cybersafety issues about specific apps, including Instagram and on how predators actively try to hunt our children. Recently, my local police department reported that through October 2025, they have made 17 arrests for predators against children. What’s more, over the past three years, they reported making 49 arrests. That’s a pretty high number considering where I live (even one is too high in my opinion).
What was notable was the distances that these men reportedly traveled to meet up with their underage targets. It made me think more about this type of activity and what parents need to learn to keep their kids safe.
What is 764?
Put simply, 764 is a loosely affiliated group of people all over the world who have goals that are abhorrent to most people. Their exact number of members is unknown. At their core, they have a hatred for the human race and humanity, which is ironic as they are part of what they hate. They reject any/all moral, religious, or social values. Key among their actions is tricking minors to carry out sexual acts, to harm themselves, and even to attempt suicide, all as they watch and record it all.
Due to their nature of staying hidden in the darkest shadows of the Internet, it’s very difficult for law enforcement to identify them. One of the more successful methods to do so by is posing as a young child and waiting for one of them to attempt to lure a child into doing something they would later regret. You would probably be appalled at how quickly people reach out to these
Their reach is global, thanks to the Internet. Here are just a few stories from England, Germany, & Canada. There are plenty of other examples from around the globe.
Their goals are despicable and are a parent’s worst nightmare, as they specifically target both boys and girls of all ages (far younger than you would expect). This is important because parents need to understand that as much as parents may engage with their children about what happens online, predators are actually engaging with them online and they’re very good at what they’re trying to do.
Five Takeaways to Help Protect Your Kids
The good news is that worldwide law enforcement agencies are aware of 764 and they have made some major arrests in 2025 of their leadership. What can parents do to help prevent any predator from grooming their child? Here are five things:
- Build up your child’s self-esteem so that they are more able to avoid attempts to trick them using the techniques I described previously for Pediatric Safety.
- Get involved in what your children are doing online and stay informed about what you need to know. If you’re reading this article, you’re already doing that.
- Let your children know that if a problem does happen, they can come to you for help. I’ve known too many kids refuse to tell their parents until it’s too late, which only makes matters worse.
- Never give an order that you know won’t be followed, such as completely banning them from using technology, because if something bad does happen, they will be less likely to come to you for help because they may expect to get into trouble for disobeying you.
- Read this article from the FBI which gives great tips on what to do and what not to do to keep your kids safe online.
Your Child’s Sick: Do You Know if They Need Antibiotics?
Last updated on March 15th, 2026 at 08:15 pm
Antibiotics are wonderful things. Since penicillin was first found and produced in the early twentieth century and used during the Second World War, it and related antibiotics have saved countless lives and cured many an illness quickly.
Antibiotics work by inhibiting certain growth factors and processes needed by bacteria to reproduce and flourish. As with many significant discoveries, penicillin was found purely by luck when an early twentieth century biochemist was trying to grow Staphylococcus (a type of bacteria). He opened the Petri dish to find that the growth of Staphylococcus seemed to be inhibited by a white substance growing next to it; that substance was studied and named “penicillin”, and indeed, did prevent growth of bacteria. The huge toll of injured and dying soldiers during the Second World War stimulated a renewed interest in the now decades old “antibiotic”, and it was pressed into service on battle fields around the world. Its successful wartime use spread to the private sector. Although initially used to help cure life threatening illnesses, it began to be used for even minor illnesses that would begin a trend that is still going on today.
The number of antibiotics in use today and their complexity is overwhelming and new ones are produced in ever increasing numbers. The primary reasons for producing a new antibiotic are to be able to treat an increasing number of bacteria known to be producing new diseases in people. Also the old antibiotics become outmoded when the existing bacteria develop very intricate mechanisms to shield themselves from the effects of the antibiotics (resistance).
Antibiotics are ineffective against viral infections, but many times well meaning health care professionals put them into use to possibly stop the advance of the viral illness (or secondary bacterial infections). Sometimes, antibiotics are dispensed at the insistent request of the parents who, in a misguided attempt to help “cure” their child of a viral illness, wish to use the latest antibiotic. At least in Pediatrics, an overwhelming majority of illness is due to viral infections and therefore speaks against the use of an antibiotic.
When antibiotics are used indiscriminately and in large amounts the following things can occur:
This is a trend that will probably continue unless health care professionals make this information available to the public. It is important to note, as new antibiotics are developed, the cost of delivering these to the portion of the population that really need them becomes prohibitive and adds tremendously to the cost of health care in this country. The process of getting a new medicine through the testing and the FDA is both very time consuming and expensive
Most of your child’s illnesses will be viral in origin and will not need an antibiotic. In addition, some routine illnesses that children get, such as ear infections, have been scrutinized carefully by researchers and their findings suggest that antibiotics may not be needed in mild ear infections. In fact, there are times that even severe ear infections can be followed carefully without the use of antibiotics as long as the pain is controlled. Every attempt is being made to limit the use of all antibiotics in general. There are certainly situations that require an antibiotic such as strep throat and certain types of pneumonia, but your doctor will discuss the options at the time of your visit.
Think both locally and globally when it comes to the use of antibiotics: it will help your child and children all over the world.
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Editor’s Note: with temperatures fluctuating wildly, (often by as much as 20 degrees on a day to day basis), it’s no wonder we’re seeing sniffles, sneezes and coughs that just won’t go away. With the questions on every parent’s mind: “is this a cold? maybe the flu? should I take them to the doctor? do I need to keep them home from school an extra day”, it seemed the perfect time to re-share this Dr Joe classic from 2010 (Antibiotics…Not Always the Answer).
Grandparents Raising Grandkids: 10 Tips to Ease the Transition
Last updated on March 15th, 2026 at 08:14 pm
In September of 2010, a poll by Pew Research found that the number of children being raised by their grandparents rose sharply since the start of the recession in 2007.
In fact, one in 10 grandparents were raising their children’s children. Statistics further show 2.9 million children or four percent of all U.S. children being raised by at least one grandparent.
In an earlier report, Pew said the number of households composed of multiple generations is higher than it has been in half a century. Parenting is tough enough as it is, but for grandparents who had dreams of retirement and are stepping in all over again, there are unique challenges for the new parent as well as the child.
Why the New Grandparenting Trend
How the child is impacted by this new relationship depends upon the reason for the arrangement as well as a few factors including the child’s age and temperament, the relationship between the child and grandparents, and the health, resources, and parenting abilities of the Grandparents. In the vast number of cases Grandma and Gramps are creating a far safer and more secure home environment for their grandkids.
Economic hardship recession is clearly the biggest reason for the trend. Parents lost their jobs or their homes and can’t afford to raise their children. But other factors weigh in for the shift: Unfit parenting due to drug or abuse is the second reason and the grandparents are trying to save grandkids from the foster care system. Military parents facing multiple deployments are entrusting their children to their parents. Whatever the reason, more grandparents are stepping up and stepping in to parent.
New Crop of Grandparents: Younger, Healthier, Wiser
It turns out today’s grandparent crop is the youngest and healthiest ever which is good news for the kids. Almost two-thirds of these grandparents are under 60 – their average age is 57. Because baby boomers had their first child about five years earlier than mothers today, they are the first generation of grandparents most likely to become great-grandparents. And they are taking their new parenting role very seriously, are highly committed, and most give themselves high marks.
Researchers at Stanford University suggest that older or “second time dads” may improve in their parenting and older dads are a growing trend. (Think: David Letterman, Rod Stewart, Kenny Rogers, Michael Douglas, Larry King, Paul McCartney and Kevin Costner who all fathered children in their 50s, 60s or 70s -some younger than these grandparents). Findings seem to support a notion that age produces far more than just wrinkles and gray hair: wisdom and parenting priorities come with those years. A few interesting tidbits about older dads parenting:
- Older dads are more involved in child rearing, more visible and want to be actively involved in childrearing.
- Older dads are more nurturing, warmer, generous with affection, and more relaxed and calmer in their parenting.
- Older dads are more willing to share child responsibility. In fact, three times more likely to do so than younger dads.
Tips for Grandparents In Your New Role
- Center on a smooth transition. The key priority is to help the child adjust to the new living arrangement as smoothly as possible. There will be bumps so expect them. Prioritize on helping the child transition and see this as his new home. Bring what you need (bed, bedspread, his favorite dish, clothes, bureau) as well as his health and school records and personal photos to help him adjust.
- Introduce yourself as the primary caregiver. Let others (parents, teachers, coaches) know your role: You are the parent. Answer those questions with pride.
- Don’t stress stuff you can’t do. Forget camping out in that pup tent with your child on those scouting overnighters. (You’ll hate yourself the next morning). Playing those rough, game of hoops on the asphalt won’t do much for your knees either. Don’t stress over what you can’t do with the child. Don’t worry if your finances are tight. You’re giving your child the most priceless gift there is: a safe and loving home.
Focus on activities you can share. Attend those musical, ballgames, movies, and dinners with the kids. Find and do the things you enjoy together. Remember, kids consider TIME together to equal love. Find those common connectors and build a relationship with your child. With age comes wisdom: older parents are more likely to focus on quality not quantity. They also know that while there are no guarantees in how their kids turn out, research proves that the strength of the parent-child relationship is the best way to raising emotionally-healthy kids. Focus on that relationship.- Keep the old, but create the new. A key goal is to create as smooth of a transition as possible and rebuild normalcy for the child. Family rituals create memories and can build security so continue past meaningful routines that are meaningful to the child (like opening presents at Christmas Eve, the special coconut birthday cake, or bedtime routines). But also create new rituals that are unique and bond him to his new family.
- Preserve the child’s dignity and privacy. If there was a traumatic reason (such as parental substance abuse, incarceration, loss of a home), keep an open dialogue with the child. Better to hear those details from you than someone else. You may want to withhold more traumatic and unflattering details about the child’s parents until he is more mature.
- Create a comeback. Chances are peers will ask why the child is living with you. Though a child never needs to give any personal and unflattering past family history, you may want to help create a simple explanation or “comeback” without all the sordid facts since she’s bound to be asked so she’s prepared.
- Seek counseling. Watch your grandchild carefully and tune into your grandchild’s emotional needs. Chances are you and the child will need psychological services to help you deal with any trauma in his past home. Seek help of a trained mental health professional, your clergy, as well as a school counselor, nurse and school psychologist.
- Get a support group. Older parents admit that one of the tougher and unique problems is that they lack a support group of parents their own age. Seek out online Grandparent Groups that are growing. AARP is another great source to offer support.
- Take care of you. Parenting is tough, but especially so when you’re dealing with a traumatic situation, financial hardship and you’re older. Join a health club, get those health check-ups, and watch your diet. A healthier, happier parent always produces a happier kid.
Youngest Citizens Are Forgotten Casualties of the Economy
The financial crunch is continuing to impact our society and our youngest citizens may well be forgotten statistics. Grandparents have always played a key role in child rearing, but from all indicators it seems they’ve moved far up on the “significant notch.”
On a personal note, I’ve dealt with a number of foster care cases and the grandparents were nothing short than miracle workers to the child. Grandpa and Grandma are absolute lifesavers. There are a number of lucky children who are blessed to have you in their lives.
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Dr Borba’s book The Big Book of Parenting Solutions: 101 Answers to Your Everyday Challenges and Wildest Worries, is one of the most comprehensive parenting book for kids 3 to 13. This down-to-earth guide offers advice for dealing with children’s difficult behavior and hot button issues including biting, tantrums, cheating, bad friends, inappropriate clothing, sex, drugs, peer pressure and much more. Each of the 101 challenging parenting issues includes specific step-by-step solutions and practical advice that is age appropriate based on the latest research . The Big Book of Parenting Solutions is available at amazon.com
4 Thumb-sucking Remedies That Work
Last updated on March 15th, 2026 at 08:14 pm
Got a sucker? As sweet as it may seem when your kids are toddlers, the nasty habit can wreak havoc on tooth and mouth development if it continues after adult teeth appear, or around age 5. Most kids stop on their own before then; others respond to gentle reminders or praise. But if your kids’ digits remain the go-to soother once they’ve started school, try these mom-tested tips for kicking the habit.
Focus on fashion: At age 3, Imani Robinson loved her two middle fingers. But she loved fashion more! Her mom, Kenya Robinson of Los Angeles, used colorful band-aids to help her kick the habit. Imani loved the pink girly ones so much she didn’t dare get them wet.
Find a role model: Whether it’s an older sibling or the cool kid down the street, find an impressive role model who either quit the habit or never started it. That’s what worked for Fred Gabriel’s younger son Jeremy. “He really wanted to emulate his big brother Sam — and Sam never sucked his thumb,” says the Kent, Conn., dad.
Dial the doctor or dentist: Sometimes, parents aren’t the best authority figures. Elena Tapper’s middle son, Dylan, was very selective sucker — going for the thumb only when he had a snuggly in hand, which was never in public. Nothing the Montclair, N.J., mom said made a difference. But when Dylan was nearly 6, the dentist sat him down and made a deal with him: On his birthday, he’d quit cold turkey. It worked.
Get creative: It took a story and a song to get Kristen Jenkins’s 3-year-old daughter Olivia to stop sucking her thumb. The Harrisburg, Penn., mom read The Berenstain Bears and the Bad Habit and made up a song to go with it: “I’m 3; no more thumb for me!” Six week later, the job was done. Andrea Van Ness of Denver grew so frustrated by her son Charlie’s incessant thumb-sucking, she created Thumbuddy To Love, a sucking cessation system that includes finger puppets, a storybook and success stickers. Her son quit in two weeks and launched her into entrepreneurship.
Stopping finger-sucking doesn’t have to be a painful process — and it may save you from future pain and expense at the orthodontist’s.
Our Super-Successful Kids Are Struggling! How to Help Them Thrive
Last updated on May 4th, 2026 at 06:31 pm
What if I told you that 1 out of every 3 kids age 6 to 11 is afraid that the Earth won’t exist when they grow up???
WHO are these children??? What if I told you that little kid you just kissed goodnight,,, who got an A on his test…who practiced her cello for hours… what if I told you they were the ones who said it. What if instead I told you they believed it and told NO ONE??? How is it possible this is happening??
Parents, meet the “Running on Empty” Generation – smart and dearly loved, inclusive and open-minded, well-educated with high aspirations for college and their future. From the outside everything you want and more for your child. But take a second look. These kids are less happy, more stressed, lonely, depressed, and suicidal than ANY other generation… and that was BEFORE COVID!
“We are college and career ready, but sure aren’t ‘human’ ready.” Erin, 16 years old
We are raising a generation of “strivers” – kids that are wonderful at reaching for the brass ring, but never feel good enough. We haven’t given them basic survival tools so when the real challenges hit, they often quit because they don’t have the inner reserve that helps them get through it…
“My parents do everything for me. My biggest worry when I leave home is that I’m going to flunk life.” 17-year-old straight-A student, headed for Yale
Surprisingly, despite today’s kids living through the most stressed time in known history – terrorism, lockdown drills, daily pandemic death counts, insurrections, food insecurity, failing power grids, climate crises and racial violence – some kids are not only surviving, but they’re also thriving.
They are bouncing back despite adversity. WHY?
In her new book THRIVERS, Dr. Michele Borba, Ed. D. shares with us the answer.
In the end, these kids – the Thrivers –manage adversity, develop healthy relationships, and embrace change. They are ready and deal proactively with whatever the world throws at them – even in uncertain times, not because of genes, GPA, IQ or a special skill or talent, but through reliance on a few character strengths they learned along the way that helped them steer their lives in a positive direction – helped them PICK THEMSELVES UP whenever their worlds came crashing down.
It is these seven essential Character Strengths that set Thrivers apart and set them up for happiness and greater accomplishment later in life. Self-confidence, empathy, self-control, integrity, curiosity, perseverance, and optimism – each of these helps safeguard our kids against the depression and anxiety that threatens to derail them. And best of all, these strengths are not something we are born with: from toddler to teen, these can be taught!
But where should you start?? THRIVERS is organized into three parts allowing parent to focus on strengths by category. It’s helpful to understand your child’s “superpowers” – what they’re already good at and can nurture – as well as areas that could use further development.
Consider how you would rate your child on the following: 5 = always, 4 = frequently, 3 = sometimes, 2 = rarely, 1 = never
My Child:
Speaks mostly positively about herself, rarely negatively.
- Displays concern and wants to help when someone is treated unfairly or unkindly.
- Can be trusted to do the right thing and keep his word even when no one is looking.
- Able to manage her own impulses and urges without adult help.
- Intrigued or easy to motivate about trying something new, different, or surprising.
- Does not become upset when something is difficult; rarely quits but keeps trying.
- Can find the silver lining in a hardship or challenge.
As I’m sure you guessed each of these questions represents one of the 7 Character Strengths and is part of a longer assessment that will help you evaluate where your child is right now so you can determine which traits are their natural strengths and which traits need to be encouraged.
Know that these traits are cumulative: each character strength improves a child’s thriving potential as well as academic performance but is always more powerful when combined with another because they create a Multiplier Effect.
Self-Confidence + Curiosity increases self-knowledge and builds self-assuredness and creativity.
Self-Control + Perseverance boosts the chance of reaching a goal and achieving success.
Empathy + Curiosity helps find common ground and strengthens relationships.
At this point some of you may be thinking…yes this all sounds good, but bottom line, I’ve got to give my child every advantage so they can get into the right school because everything depends on that.
But does it? According to Dr. Borba these amazing, brilliant, talented kids are checking out – the urgency in writing this book came from an email from a distraught mom looking for help from her community:
“We have forty dead kids in two-and-a-half years to suicide within a twenty-mile radius. Most are white, affluent, high achieving males who did not use drugs but hung themselves. Most look like your kids and mine. The last seven have been females – two with guns.”
“It’s like we’re being produced to be test takers. We’re missing the pieces on how to be people.” Aaron, 12 years old
The epidemic of unhappy Strivers is real, but it’s not inevitable. We can do something about it. As Dr. Borba says “all our energy has gone into stretching kids’ cognitive abilities and neglecting their human side – the source of energy, joy, inspiration and meaning. The good news: focusing on character can flip that equation and teach your kids how to find happiness, calm and wonder in the world.“
But we NEED to pay attention… We SHOULD be worried… WE NEED to listen!!
“There’s an amazing amount of depression and anxiety. Seventy percent of my friends are in therapy; forty percent are on medication. We’re hurting but nobody does anything until another kid is suicidal.” Ava, 15 years old.
One last thought that I’d like to finish with. It is terrifying that our children – even the young ones – go to sleep worried about global warming, pandemics, racial violence, school shootings… the list goes on and on. It is even more terrifying that many of them don’t believe their generation will live to see the future. But there is something Dr. Borba’s book reminded me of that I’d like to share with you, and maybe you can share it with your kids.
Years ago a man named Fred Rogers brought optimism, love and hope to families across the country – and in these dark times we could all use a little of his outlook. With each new terror – each bombing, virus, terrorist attack, natural disaster, hate crime or mass shooting we wonder, “what shall we tell our children?” Fred Rogers had the perfect answer:
“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of disaster, I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers, so many caring people in this world”.
My belief, and the reason I share this with all of you, is that this current generation of kids is in pain and they are struggling. Dr. Michele Borba (and THRIVERS) is one of the helpers.
Editors Note: all quotes included in this article, including those attributed to individual children and Fred Rogers can be found in THRIVERS: The Surprising Reasons Why Some Kids Struggle and Others Shine
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Across the nation, student mental health is plummeting, major depression rates among teens and young adults are rising faster than among the overall population, and younger children are being impacted. As a teacher, educational consultant, and parent for 40 years, Dr. Michele Borba has never been more worried than she is about this current generation of kids. In THRIVERS, Dr. Borba explains why the old markers of accomplishment (grades, test scores) are no longer reliable predictors of success in the 21st century – and offers 7 teachable traits that will safeguard our kids for the future. She offers practical, actionable ways to develop these Character Strengths (confidence, empathy, self-control, integrity, curiosity, perseverance, and optimism) in children from preschool through high school, showing how to teach kids how to cope today so they can thrive tomorrow. THRIVERS is now available at amazon.com.
